Coupon Crazy

Hey Errrr-body!

It’s me! “Too Busy To Update As Much As I Want To Glynnis!”  Today I am going to write  a little bit about my personal life, so get ready for some in your face information about yours truly (it’s not that in your face, I’m just sensationalizing so that you will keep reading)! I’ve recently started cohabitating with my gentleman friend and it is awesome. It’s like hang out time with your best friend ALL THE TIME! In addition to getting to spend lots of my time with my gentleman friend, I get to learn things about him that I may not have noticed before we lived in the same place. The most interesting thing I have learned thus far is that my gentleman friend LOVES coupons. HARD.

I had my first glimpse of his obsession two weeks ago when I recycled the Sunday paper that had been sitting on our kitchen table for a week. When he came home from work and asked where the paper was, I responded “Oh, I threw it away.” Then he gave me a very serious look and said, “But there were coupons in there.” The way he said this sounded like instead of “coupons,” he meant to say “defenseless, adorable puppies.” After composing himself, my gentleman friend forgave me and asked that I not do it again.

Fast forward to last night! I succeeded in not slaughtering this week’s batch of coupons. My gentleman friend sat down to the small stack of coupon booklets and looked them over (the way he did this reminded me of the way a cigar conoisseur might smell a Cuban). First, he put aside the Best Buy coupon book for “later” (Best Buy is one his favorite places and thus, it’s coupon book is a dessert of sorts). For the next 25 minutes, my gentleman friend looked at every, single coupon. While perusing the coupons, he ran the gamut of human emotions: He laughed at coupons that offered less than $0.25 in savings. He raged at coupons that expected him to spend $15 in order to save $1.  He rejoiced when he found a coupon for the shampoo we had. He felt sadness over coupons that encouraged consumers to by bulk quantities of unhealthy foods. It was quite the journey.

And I laughed the whole time. When I was beginning to cry because I was laughing so hard, my gentleman friend got defensive and explained (very seriously) that coupon clipping was “better than shopping” for him because he can do it sitting down and alone. When this only made me laugh harder, he snapped and yelled “Well, at least the coupons I pick out can save us money! Look at what YOU picked out.” He gestured angrily at the only coupon I set aside on the table. This is it:

It would be difficult to name all of the reasons I love this coupon, so I’ll just state a few of the things that are AMAZING about this ad.

  • I love the upscale French manicure and sassy pose that these feet are striking. It’s probably because they feel SO GOOD!

  • Surprise gift?! I love surprises AND gifts! This particular feature appeals to my rabid sense of curiosity and greed for presents. I wonder if the gift comes wrapped in pink paper and a blue bow? Also, is the present somehow related to the product? Or could it be ANYTHING?

  • I’m sorry – this statement is patently false. I believe it would be impossible to forget that you are wearing your Therapeutic Cozy Toes.

  • I love how in the “Before” picture, one of the toes is clearly broken and emitting some kind of loud, jarring noise. Apparently, Therapeutic Cozy Toes can reset bones and make your feet sparkle! *PING!*

  • Ouch! Sucks to have hammer toes AND live in California. At least it’s sunny there?

So yeah, it’s kind of incredible and maybe I am seriously thinking about purchasing a pair of these bad boys…just so I can get the free gift. And to think! If it weren’t for my gentleman friend and his coupon-mania, I would never even KNOW about Therapeutic Cozy Toes! *Shudder* I don’t like to think about that kind reality.

Coupon Cartoon:


11 thoughts on “Coupon Crazy

  1. Maybe I just got a coupon for a free Brixx pizza in the mail as my ‘welcome to the neighborhood’ gift… three months later…

  2. I LOVE COUPONS TOO!!! Yesterday, I opened a birthday package from my parents. In addition to gifts, they mailed the Sunday coupons from the past few weeks. I almost hyperventilated.

    1. They are on my list as well. I mean, the boys will just go wild when you come into the bedroom wearing your Therapeutic Cozy Toes…ONLY your Therapeutic Cozy Toes (hereafter referred to at TCT).

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