Heeeeeere’s Kosbie!

For a blog named “The Kosbie Show,” there is a shocking lack of Kosbie ’round here. Today, I’m taking some time to introduce everyone’s (soon to be) favorite mascot: Kosbie!

Kosbie!


As a child, I had a fervent interest in wild life. Alright, I was obsessed. Before I realized it was impossible (and when I’m really honest with myself, for a little while after that), I wanted to be a dog when I grew up. I used to run around on all fours, tie “leashes” (jump ropes) to myself and even tried to give myself a black eye so that it would look like a spot,  à la Patch from 101 Dalmatians. When I finally accepted that it was never going to happen, I turned all my energy towards acquiring a dog. My parents shot me down immediately. Not wanting to completely crush all my hopes and dreams, my dad bought me “The Encyclopedia of The Dog” so I could learn all about dogs and how to care for them. In the spirit of that book, which was my bible for most of the 90’s, I’ll introduce  Kosbie in the format of a dog encylopedia:

HISTORY
Picked up on the highway by the local authorities in South Carolina, Kosbie’s pre-pound life is somewhat of a mystery. She was 2 when I adopted her and I think she had a family before me because she knew how to fetch from day one and was super easy to house break. Sadly, she came with a little baggage – she rarely barks, has a scar around her neck where her fur won’t grow and dislikes loud noises, plastic bags and anything stick-like being pointed at her.

UPKEEP
I don’t know how this dog isn’t bald. I have vacuumed, swiffered, swept and lint rolled enough of her hair to build an entire army of Kosbies. On a more positive note, her coat has every color of the doggie fur rainbow! Red, brown, grey, tan, black and white.

FORM AND FUNCTION
I think Kos is a mix of Finnish Spitz and some breed of dog used to herd sheep, but the truth is we’ll never know! Some good friends of mine once determined that her make up is as follows:

1 c. fox
1 c. wolf
1 tbsp. goat
1/2 c. grinch
2 chops  à la martin van buren
a pinch of dog

Sounds about right.

HEALTH
Just like me, Kosbie has bad teeth and likes to overeat, but besides that, she’s a sturdy little mutt!

TEMPERAMENT
Cowardly yet curious, the Kosbie is always underfoot! She loves to be included and have everyone’s attention, but on her own terms. What are Kosbie’s terms? I don’t think she knows. She loves everyone she meets for the first 5 minutes, adores some people forever and is completely indifferent to others. She initially did not like petting or any form of affection, but is becoming more and more of a buddy as time goes on. Pound puppies can be a little bit more work, but the pay off is worth it.


At A Glance (rating 1-5)

Energy Level:  4
Exercise requirements:  3
Playfulness:  4
Affection level:  2
Friendliness toward dogs:  1
Friendliness toward other pets:  2
Friendliness toward strangers:  5
Ease of training:  4
Watchdog ability:  0
Protection ability:  -2
Grooming requirements:  3
Cold tolerance:  4
Heat tolerance:  2

So that’s my pup in a nutshell! The minute she tugged her way into the visitation area at the pound, I knew she was my dog. Kosbie bounded towards me, stopped 20 feet shy of the bench I was sitting on and took a dump. The rest, as they say, is history!!

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15 thoughts on “Heeeeeere’s Kosbie!

  1. what a lovely face! my dog Alvina is a constantly shedding breed – i was told she was part Australian Shepard but Emma thinks she’s part Angora rabbit. Alvina will also meet burglars at the door and guide them to the refrigerator…

  2. OH MAN. I can’t tell who/what I love more – Kosbie or your blog! Kosbie’s love for me is truly reciprocated. What a dog! Also, those stories of you pretending to be a dog for most of your childhood have always been some of my favorites. This post has made my day!

  3. Oh my God, KOSBIE! I can’t wait to meet the new-and-improved Kosbie…maybe she’ll like me for more than my chickensmells this time?

    Remember how the initial conversation about adopting a dog occurred during a drunk and antagonistic conversation in our living room? Talk about the BEST FOLLOW THROUGH EVER.

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